Farmer Audrey

I've been thinking a lot about goals, motivation, and what I want to do lately. 

The answer is: I don't know. 

Coming from a family that is so successful is hard when you aren't sure what success will look like for yourself. I'm beginning to think I need to define success in many other ways. 

Success is having a kick as marriage. 
Success is ensuring that our family has what it needs, and the space to have freedom to follow our passions. 
Success is living a happy and healthy life. 

When I think about this list, the concept of success seems more simple. Success is attainable, and I am more or less successful. So how does it go up from here?

I think the big key is freedom. We are living in the rat-race that is DC Metro. We want to travel and pursue other hobbies that are expensive. We want to be able to have a garden and space for the dogs to run around. Living in a city where land is at a premium and rent and/or mortgage payments are sky high cuts back on some of that freedom. 

So where do we go from here?

Maybe to the farm. 

Looking at cost of living calculators, we could make 40,000 less than we do in DC and have a comparatively similar standard of living in the middle of nowhere land where my family comes from. It's close enough to a bigger city to get us to culture on weekends.  If we both got jobs I'm guessing the pay cut we take would be closer to 20,000. The place we'd live would be no more than 250/month maybe 500/month if we fix up the place.  There would be space for the dogs to run around. There would be more than enough space for a garden. And we could even keep chickens and/or bees. 

It's a crazy idea, but if cost of living calculators are correct and comparable jobs exist that would mean a bunch of additional income to pursue our passions. 

And I have other farm related dreams and goals.. I'll dream more about those another time. I've got a date tonight. :-) 

Almost 30

So. In about 10 days, I'll be 30.

There are a few options here.
1) Freak out and cry. No thanks. I'd rather not. Life is pretty awesome, and I have no regrets so why not celebrate? Since I'm celebrating....

2) I could go out and get WASTED. Um. No. Since nothing can compare to my amazing 20th brithday/80s Dance Party on board the S.S. Universe Explorer I'm not going to try. That, and I'm pretty sure there are better ways of celebrating.

3) I can celebrate thoughtfully, have an amazing dinner with amazing people, and set awesome goals for my 30th year. <- DONE! The dinner is being planned. My husband is amazing and I think has a few things up his sleeve. I have a short list of things I'd like (which includes an amazing meal) And I've reflected on a few things I've done before turning 30.

I was curious about what people do, or think they should do before they turned 30, and I found a list that worked pretty well for me. I checked off a ton on it, but I don't want to think about the things I haven't done. Thirty is not a death sentence. It's an age, and a part of life for those of us who are fortunate enough not to die young.

Since the original list had 150, I figured I'd made my list match that number, and then I added another thing, because I felt like it needed it. Excuse the mixed up verb tenses, the list is made of many lists of things people should do before they are 30, and my own random thoughts.

My random and amazing list of things I've done before I turned 30:


01. Thrown a killer party
02. Swam in the ocean
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken my parents out to eat.   
05. Become a mentor
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10.Open a Retirement Account
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Live by yourself
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. See your favorite band
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Go skinny dipping
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Took a tango lesson
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32.Made my own cheese
33. Seen an eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Had a one night stand
36. Danced like a fool and didn’t care who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Done drugs
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Do a half ironman
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Taken a midnight walk on the beach
50. Study abroad
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. Done something that scares you to death
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played ultimate frisbee
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Learn to cook
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Buy an original piece of art
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken an art class
71. Played board games for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Find a favorite Dive bar. Become a regular.
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Go skiing
79. Cook a holiday meal
80. Get a master’s degree
81. White water rafting
82. Been on a national TV Show
83. Gotten flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Stay at a bed and breakfast
87. Start a budget
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Go to a psychic
90. Attended a music festival
91. Gone on a blind date.
92. Buried a loved one
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Get a job with benefits
95. Known someone performing in a burlesque show
96. Registered as a bone marrow donor
97. Forgiven myself for my mistakes
98. Passed out cold
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Adopt a dog
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking with the windows open
103. Teach a class
104. Get a speeding ticket
105. Vote
106. Go to Graceland
107. Get promoted
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Get fired
112. Bid at an auction
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had piercign other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Complimented a complete stranger
120. Spoken to a large audience  
121. Been to the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for 30 hours in a 48 hour period
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. States (Even-ish)
124. Been serenaded
125. Camped for more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Read the bible
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Gone to a Chicago blues bar
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and eaten an animal
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Started writing a novel
140. Speak at a conference
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Hold a koala bear
143. Purchased a meal for a hungry person
144. Spent all the money in my checking account
145. Take a trip by myself
146. Dyed your hair
147. Be comfortable with the person you are.
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life
151. Directed a museum (had to throw that in, even if it didn’t work out well at all)




Like I said, no regrets here.

Letting Go

The time has come to let go of things, namely a whole slew of old papers and whatnot that are really not useful to me. It's all jumbled into a few boxes that have been sitting in a corner of one apartment or another as long as I've lived in Northern Virginia.

And now it's time to let it go. In the past such attempts have gone like this: "I can't throw that away! I may need it for...... gradschool! art projects! to remember that I've travelled!"

The new question I ask myself won't be about what that was for when I acquired it. It won't be about my future self using it.

I plan on simply asking myself the questions of so many others who have minimalized. Is this useful? Is this beautiful?

I will measure progress by the ability to actually SEE progress in our living space. Currently the boxes are 'behind' our kitchen table causing a lot of clutter. Ick.  

A New Start

I've not been very good at this blogging thing, but I hope to turn that around. Aside from the wedding, and getting a second job just a few months before the wedding, I've been thinking a lot about living intentionally. Just thinking about living intentionally does not get anyone very far though. It's time for that to change.

Jim and I have made a few goals, but we are slow to take steps to really achieve them. Part of this was a bit of a honeymoon for us. We didn't take a lot seriously for a month after the wedding, which we needed. We did re-arrange the apartment. We relaxed. We found out we both have a bit of an obsession with "How I Met Your Mother" and watched 3 seasons in as many weeks. Didn't I just say I've been thinking about living intentionally? I guess that's enough to wear me out.  

Last weekend we went to Wyoming for a family reunion with my family. While, I don't think you can consider that honeymooning, the trip did give us some time to think about where we might live. We also may have realized that 100% rural is not for us, as romantic as it sounds. (Ok, I knew that, but now I really know that).

So, I'm getting back into posting as a means of accountability. I've thought a lot about life, and where I want to go and think I'm able to break this down into a few themes. Structure has got to be a good thing, right? For this blog I'm hoping for the following:

1) Hold myself accountable as I work towards the goals I share with Jim and a few of my own.

2) Begin to take photos to add to the blog, and do that, regularly. (I think this will help with goals).

3) Use this blog to spur my own professional development. More on that later.

So that's this blog. That's where I am, and a hint at where I am going. I will post more about goals shortly.

Goal 1 for the New Year: $3000 and a Fit Wallet

I'm hoping to accomplish some goals with the New Year. This first is to use this blog more. So for the next few days I'm going to outline a goal for the year each day. 


I originally started the blog to track a debt free year. I did not have a debt free year. In fact, I spent most of the year paying down purchases I had to make with the credit card, then having to make more with the credit card. Bad move. I just paid the thing off- pre-Christmas. Good move. 


With the wedding Jim and I are working on saving. The yearly goal is $3,000 on top of what we already save and on top of any gifts received.  That should be easy. It's 125 each a month. That should also cover air-fare for our year later honeymoon planed for 2013. So that's the big, measurable goal. 


The less measurable goal it to approach money differently. I want to approach it like I approach a race.


Hanging out with my parents is always wonderful. But as I 'grow up' it becomes apparent that my parent's handle money really well, and not just because they make a bunch. They are reasonable, and know how to enjoy things that they treat as indulgences. Their indulgences are not daily things, but things like fishing trips for the family while we are at the beach house. They pace themselves, if you will so they can enjoy what counts. 


I think the race metaphor is good for me, because I can pace myself and manage my race like a pro when I'm in shape. You get in shape, you know what you can do, and you do it, but save enough that those last few minutes of the race you can pick it up, reel people in and fly by them. If you've done a good job you aren't laid up for a week because of your efforts.  Granted, for most of the race people are flying by me, but there are people who set themselves up for me to pass later on by not pacing themselves early on. 


So, while there is a money saving goal for the year, there's also a bigger, more important goal. It's to get in shape, learn to pace myself and enjoy those things that are important and that I remember. That means my indulgences can't be things like a latte in the morning. Really, they shouldn't. That's not an indulgence. It's an expensive habit. A great indulgence is not feeling squeezed when going out to a fancy dinner with J. A great indulgence is surprise airfare to go visit friends and family. A great indulgence is replacing the TV that direly needs replacing. 


Being able to afford and enjoy these indulgences means being able to afford  the other parts of life without hassle. Dogs need to go to the vet. Cars need maintenance and sometimes repair. Emergency funds need funding. 


So this goal is going to work like training for a race season, with a few basic phases. These won't work exactly like a race season. Life is dynamic and there are going to be moments that call for certain behaviors, so while there are steps, they may all be simultaneous. 


Phase 1- Build a base- get the house in order, get into shape and figure out where your limits are and how to push yourself further. It's painful at times and feels like it's taking over your life, but it's mandatory if you're going to run a successful race. I think I have an okay base at this point, but it needs work. Base building should happen as a part of the normal course of things. 


Steps: 
            - Review the budget
            - Determine what is excessive and what is necessary
            - Refine my savings plan


Phase 2- Speed building- For the financial goal this is going to work on getting over obstacles, and learning how to manage the race. It's living, but not indulging. It's determining how to make indulgences easier. What shortcuts are there? 


Steps: 
         - Learn about Travel Hacking
         - Reduce crap. Sell what we can. 
         - Choosing indulgences.  


Phase 3- Race- Live, follow the plan, use my base, remember my speed training, and enjoy the finish. Enjoy what counts. There are times in the race where you are in a pain cave. No surprise. It'll happen. There have been good and bad training days. But there is a time to enjoy it. 


Steps:
        - Be aware of surroundings.
        - Don't use the slightly faster person to pace yourself early on.
        - Enjoy the ride. 




I think in a way my metaphor gets confusing. It happens. There are not really phases in this whole living thing, but I think they all sort of happen, and you just have to choose what phase you're in. For January we are in Phase 1. Saving and recouping. Figuring out what our base is and how we can work on speed. There's not a lot of racing to be done when it's so cold out. 

Bliss

I don't know when.
I don't know where. 
But I do know that I'm getting married, without a doubt, to my most favorite person ever. 


And that makes me very happy. 


Hopefully I will write more about it. 

Writing and Planning

I am so adult. I have an IRA and everything.

I also have to move. I"m pretty much through with my apartment. We are broken up. It's so aggravating. The rent is going up too much for a renewal. So, the plan is... it is.. to move.

Here's the thing about this area. There is no great place. What are we giving up? Location? Outside space?  Laundry? Closets? The ability to pay for race registrations?

I don't know. Hopefully the perfect place shows up on craigslist or some for rent by owner site. In the meantime I want to get ready to move. Reducing the amount of stuff I have, organizing, and dreaming of all the things I want to do with a new place.

My last assignment to myself worked really well. I was finished within 3-4 days. I should have documented. My new assignment to myself will be to remove all the photos from albums that were stuck into the albums so they'd have a place to go. They will be rehoused into an archival box. Extra Credit: Put together 2-3 nice albums with pictures of things people would want to see.

Assignment 2: Sweaters. I need to organize them and weed out a lot. I have a lot of sweaters that I don't wear, but keep because maybe I'll nee it. I need to reduce these to sweaters I wear and that look good on me. It's all about managing the wardrobe. Extra Credit: Get wool-lite and wash some of them.

Due Date: 3 weeks.  July 7.

Spinning Up Hill

Blog, what happened!? We did great there, for at least one whole entry. 

Non-profit me is back. I went to a bike co-op meeting tonight. I am excited to start helping to get things organized. That's a very cool place, that seems to need help. I also have a meeting to help with fundraising letters at the art league. I'm finding my footing again and it feels really good.

So, hopefully all this time will become time well spent and I'll soon be on the road to where I'm going- where ever that may be. Ability to balance my life with all of this? It will come.

Training, work, two volunteer gigs, keeping up with things at home (I got a lesson in keeping my stove clean from the maintenance guy today- oops), re-paying of my credit cards (wasn't this blog supposed to be about that to begin with?) yep, I can take it. I feel my energy picking back up already. Yesterday my mind was racing before bed with ideas, making it hard to sleep. I've needed more to do in my life, my job isn't one that could currently fulfill me, but it's doing a good job of giving me what I need. 

What was that about my credit cards? February happened... did I mention that? So, I was over 1000 in the hole because I lost my back wheel, got into a fender bender, paid car insurance, paid for a year at the fairfax county rec center, and had an unplanned hotel stay to save my sanity in the worst driving experience in my life. Currently that debt's down to 650. Mint projects I'll be finished with that mess in July. My other financial goal? Start a Roth IRA. I'm giving myself a month- till June 20th. The hold-up is figuring out what to do with the money in the account. I need to research some money market accounts. I'm going to start it off with 500 from savings, I think. And then put in 50/month..... I think that will work out well with only some slight re-arranging. I'd do it now but I don't know where to put the money. There. This blog was supposed to be about my debt free-ness... well there's a whole mini financial summary. 

Sometimes adulthood is just not my thing.

                           

This all started with the government shutdown. You, know- the one that never happened.

Since my job is government related I began to daydream about spring break. Of course, I wouldn't have been furloughed, since I work for a private company. I just couldn't help but begin to daydream. Reading, time to train, adventures, a beach trip, hiking around on some mountain, drawing, figuring out what I want to do with my life. I could have had time for it all. I wouldn't have gotten any of that, but I can dream, can't I?

On top of all that I'm re-reading the Dharma Bums. 

The result of all this was is that my brain has gotten stuck in the change loop. These routines that have become my life seem worn and rusty. I don't feel like I am pushing myself. I want to run wild. I want to go hike Matterhorn with Japhy, forget that I own an iphone, and feel connected with the earth and whatever it is that binds us to it.

Maybe the modern condition of government shutdowns, recession, earthquakes and meltdowns, antibiotics and hormones in food, chemicals in plastics, and revolution and war in the middle east has gotten to me. Maybe I'm tired of staring at a screen for 8 hours a day, and coming home to play with a smart phone while mindlessly watching TV when I'm not training for a triathlon, recovering from training, or sleeping. Maybe the suburban life that has neither the drive of a city or the tranquility of a mountain top has dropped me into a funk. Maybe I'm just Beat at the moment.

It's the sort of scene Norman Mailer once set before writing: "It is on this bleak scene that a phenomenon has appeared: the American existentialist—the hipster, the man who knows that if our collective condition is to live with instant death by atomic war, relatively quick death by the State as l’univers concentrationnaire, or with a slow death by conformity with every creative and rebellious instinct stifled (at what damage to the mind and the heart and the liver and the nerves no research foundation for cancer will discover in a hurry) , if the fate of twentieth century man is to live with death from adolescence to premature senescence, why then the only life-giving answer is to accept the terms of death, to live with death as immediate danger, to divorce oneself from society, to exist without roots, to set out on that uncharted journey into the rebellious imperatives of the self.

I think that in the Fall of '57, when The White Negro was published, perhaps that was the only answer. Certainly that answer became what we know as the iconic 60s. Today I feel like there are other answers. We don't have to drop out. I'd really like to think that at least. For the most part I really enjoy my life, and although I've admittedly run away from it at times, I don't really care to drop out of society. I'm done running. You can travel around the world, and never-never land exists on mountaintops, and at the end of the day it doesn't change much.  Not that I don't plan on figuring out how to go all over the world or live on mountaintops again, but in the future either option is going to look very different. 

So, what's the answer? How can you live within modernity? Obviously, the ending of the 20th century didn't change much. Obviously, every generation since the beginning of man has spent a considerable amount of energy attempting to figure this out. That's the thing- there are no universal answers. I feel like I'm getting closer, but I am not there yet. That's probably the answer- we get there, little by little. 

                           

Ready.

Today I got home, opened the door to the porch, opened a beer and opened a book and enjoyed the warm wonderful weather. I forgot that I spent the day at work, re-seting passwords and unable to breathe. Even if I was still unable to breathe. 

It's wonderful how things can melt away so that only everything good and wonderful remains. My life is crazy and messy and fantastic. I am so thankful for what I have and for the people in my life.

But I can do so much better. I'm working with a friend at accountability. It's time to start making changes and to get back on track. It's time to not settle, but to trust myself.

Right after I made that last post, the wheel fell of my bike. I've been quiet for the rest of the month because I really didn't want February to go down as the most expensive month ever. Anyone who has a bike, please note, having the back wheel fall off is super expensive. Luckily, I have an amazing boyfriend who is fixing it once and for all, 3 cartridges, 1 wheel-set and a chain later. It took a few wrong steps to get it right. 

And now, this weekend, I can finally start training for this half-ironman like a big girl, on my bike. 

As I think about training, about work, an about simplifying my life it boils down to one common theme. Organize BEFORE things get crazy. Unfortunately it's all at the crazy stage. I spend my days at work putting out fires at a level or two above my pay grade. I'm 9 weeks out from race day and don't remember how to ride a bike (exaggeration, sure, but I'm nervous still). I am slowly getting things together at home, but don't have tons of time for that either. Hopefully I'll be able to spend some time on that this weekend after finishing up stained glass stuff, riding my bike and running lots. 

I'm stoked. I'm done with traveling for a few months until race season starts. And I'm going to make some time, by choosing to take things off my list one by one.

Time Crunched Triathlete

So I'm registered for a half ironman in May. 

AHH! 

I'm also taking stained glass, work has picked up, and life is insane. I've not been balancing it all well. The bag of clothes I created for Goodwill in October is still sitting in the office. Have I been floating since then?


I know that I can get things organized. I know I can handle everything, but somehow I'm failing at getting everything together and training regularly. 6 days a week is looking more and more impossible. 4-5 seems doable. But I have to ensure that I am getting a good workout in, and in the winter it's tough. 


Do I need to start making myself accountable to a blog? Maybe so. 


This week. Laundry. 2 runs. A swim. A ride. Clothes to Goodwill. Recycles out. 


That's achievable. Very achievable. 


Now: I started this with the intention of a year long debt free experiment. I've since put quite a bit into savings. Currently: Good credit and little debt is awesome, especially when life throws you an emergency hotel stay and a fender bender the same month you're buying a year long gym membership and paying a 6 month insurance premium. A little credit card debt will have to do for a month or so. At least it's tax return time, right?

Simple. Easy.

Oh! I should be better about posting, but it seems life has just sped up.

I saved substantially on groceries and food. I'm hoping to keep it up through the end of the year so I can afford everything else in my life without reducing the amount I'm putting into savings. I like this experiment that I have going on. I think it's helping to get my priorities in order.

My new theme to add to everything that is going on in my life is decluttering. In part I need to do this because of my new part time work project, grantwriting. In part I think it's simply a better way to live. Yesterday, I cleaned out my closet. A bag of clothing is going to goodwill.

This weekend my project will be my office. Shredding papers, getting rid of college notebooks, getting rid of useless stuff. Time permitting the next projects are going to be reorganizing photographs and getting rid of stuff from my many travels. I have receipts, and things that will actually never get used or looked at meaningfully. It's time. Otherwise I will continue accumulate, and not have room or time for things that may actually matter one day.

I want life, as far as I can control it, to be simple and easy, and organized.

How to scratch my feet.

My feet have been feeling itchy recently. I don't know what to do to counteract that. 

I only have 2 free weekends between now and 2011, so it's not because I lack anything to do. I'm tackling a half marathon in a week and a half, come hell or high water, so it's not because I'm lacking challenges. I'm probably more happy with my life as it is now than I care to admit, so it isn't that something desperately needs changing either. 

What could it be?

I am a little disappointed that stained glass class was full this fall, perhaps I have too much pent up creative energy. Or of course I could just have too much energy. 


Partially, I think I'm feeling the need to travel again. That just requires so much planning. I need to be able to take a week off, have the money to spend, a destination in mind, and I want my man to be able to come with. That adds up to a whole lot of moving parts.  What happened to summer vacation that automatically meant TIME. Where's the gig that will get me to that point again?



All I know is that I need to be out of my box. If even for a weekend. Place, perspective, activities.  I'm taking suggestions for adventures of all sorts of varieties.

Flying Broccoli Salad

Tonight, on the way to a work cookout, I had one of those stop and stare and wonder if in fact this is your life moments.

After preparing the most delicious broccoli salad, it flew down the stairs on my way out of my building. Flew. Being a triathlete, and walking into porta potties with bare feet on a semi regular basis, eating the salad doesn't phase me at all. I picked it up, fast.

(I know, you're grossed out right now, but i bet you still kiss your dog on the mouth and you know where that tongue goes)

I should have just brought it to the thing because people said they would have had some anyway. sigh. It's still in my fridge. It's still delicious. I'm disgusting and I don't care.

Delicious broccoli salad:

a whole bunch of raw broccoli
most or all of a red onion cut up.
bacon
sunflower seeds
crasins
mayo
a little vinegar
a little sugar.

Mix. Don't drop on the floor. Enjoy. It wins at BBQs of all sorts.

Race Thoughts.

Yesterday was Nation's Triathlon. I was able to hit a new PR if only by 10 seconds. I think that if my knee felt better, I was actually feeling well enough that I could have taken off a bit more time.

I have a half marathon in three weeks. Ice, ibprofen, rest and a few long runs and I think i'll be in a good place for it. And, if I do well and can keep up a training schedule, I suspect a half iron is on my list for next year.

To get started with this training business I've got to loose some weight. I'd do so well if I had 10-15 fewer pounds to tote doing these things. So much better. I think it's a possibility. I've done it before. I simply have to get my head in the right place for it again. Just a few changes and sticking to a training plan...

I'll get it. I'll write about it. All of it.


I get paid tomorrow, at midnight. My bank account is so super excited. My plan is to continue to not allow myself to spend for about another month. I'll have a few expenses sure. The tax bill for my car came in, but is less than registration was in TN.  But I'm hoping to follow my rules of packing lunch, planning meals and not going out. (saving the two things I have planned this week). Things will look much better at the other end of this month, and even better a month from now. I'm sure of it.

Food and Money and Money and Food

So. I had a wonderful birthday. I didn't do anything really 'exciting' or fantastic, except to get a venti pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks for breakfast. My birthday is my unofficial opening day of pumpkin spice latte season. They are delicious treats. So, I had my latte and got lots of wonderful happy birthdayness, and was cooked a delicious dinner by my most favorite person. It was a good day. A true birthday celebration will take place next week, at a pub. There will be much mischeif as there cannot be right before a race.

And for my birthday, my debts are paid! I paid a parking ticket. I paid my credit card. I paid a pet deposit to my apartment (after a year of not paying it). The only money I owe to anything outstanding is about $2.64, which was some sort of discover interest charge that will be paid as soon as the whole scheduling process catches up with my dwindling bank account. 

And how will I help my poor little bank account? (right now, poor and little are the BEST ways to describe it) My focus this month is retraining my food shopping habits. I did a little math, and for the past 9 months I've spent, on average, $573.55 on food. EVERY month. That's a lot of money to eat. So I'm working on decreasing that, and so far I think I've been pretty successful.  It's the 10th, and so far I've spent $155 on food. I'm expecting to not spend any more on eating for about a week, save a post race meal. With a little planning that $155 bought me a lot of what I need for quite a bit of time. I'm pretty excited. If I keep this up, for two months, I think a) I'll get the hang of it and b) my bank account will be back to it's happier type levels. Until, of course, it is time to pay property tax on my car. I've never done it before and I'm honestly a little worried about what the bill may be.

Beginning

Tonight feels like sort of a wash so I'm going to write this introductory entry to attempt to salvage something from my evening. 

I got home, after stopping by J's to pick up my yoga mat, bike gear, and bicycle and cooked dinner. I made a soup that I like with red lentil and swiss chard. It didn't come out as good as it typically does. :-/  The soup also took forever. I don't remember waiting around that much previously. Result: soso okay soup that I'll be eating for days and sapping all time and energy that was supposed to also be spent on a short run... 

...Nation's Tri is 5 days away. I don't know how prepared I feel for this race. I know I can finish. I also know that parts of it are going to hurt. So I'm left to think about goals. My goals for the race? Finish feeling good enough that training for next year sounds exciting. I am going to need something to keep my going, something I'm going to have to discover. 

I suppose the real reason I am beginning to keep this is to remind myself to find better ways of doing things. Primarily I'm setting a goal for myself. In 2 days I'll have my 28th birthday. My gift to myself is to live, completely, within my means. This means no credit that is not paid off in it's entirety that month. Historically, I've not been good at doing this. I've never carried vast amounts of debt, but I've seen the way it builds and grows. 

I'm taking control. 9/9 will be D-day for any debt. Pending some huge crisis I will have a year of zero debt. Might that mean I can't buy plane tickets right away when the mood strikes? Yes. Will it mean that I won't be taking a stained glass class? Yes. (at least for this fall). Maybe I can end up doing those things, they are just going to take a little more planning. I can plan. I can plan the shit out of things. I don't know how to predict the future, so I think that may make this a neat experiment.